The secret ingredient

For some reason, corporations just don't like people spilling their secrets.

And it doesn't make a lick of sense to this Shirtmaster.

After all, isn't that the nature of the 'free market' which so greatly benefits these lumbering behemoths of commerce? That, armed with solid information, us consumers can make rational choices about how we exercise our purchasing power, thereby letting the market 'decide' who succeeds and who doesn't. It's the invisible guiding hand of the market place.

But wait; if corporations have secrets about their products, that don't allow consumers to have all the information that they might like to have about a product or organisation, than it's not possible to 'make rational choices about how we exercise our purchasing power.' Thus undermining one of the founding premises of the 'free market.'

Whew! Disproving the viability of free-market capitalism is a hard way to start a work-week! Time for a nap! Oh, and the secret ingredient is one goatee hair per order, from the artificially preserved and sustained head of the founding Colonel (who, by the way, is no General; that's for sure.) Enjoy your lunch!